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Iceman
sent this over to me a few weeks ago, and I thought it was
funny enough to post. Thanks man. :)
Once
upon a midnight dreary, fingers cramped and vision bleary,
System manuals piled high and wasted paper on the floor, Longing
for the warmth of bed sheets, still I sat there doing spreadsheets.
Having
reached the bottom line I took a floppy from the drawer, I
then invoked the SAVE command and waited for the disk to store,
Only this and nothing more.
Deep
into the monitor peering, long I sat there wond'ring, fearing,
Doubting, while the disk kept churning, turning yet to churn
some more.
But
the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token.
"Save!"
I said, "You cursed mother! Save my data from before!"
One thing
did the phosphors answer, only this and nothing more, Just,
"Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
Was this
some occult illusion, some maniacal intrusion? These were
choices undesired, ones I'd never faced before.
Carefully
I weighed the choices as the disk made impish noises. The
cursor flashed, insistent, waiting, baiting me to type some
more. Clearly I must press a key, choosing one and nothing
more, from "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
With
fingers pale and trembling, slowly toward the keyboard bending,
Longing for a happy ending, hoping all would be restored,
Praying for some guarantee, timidly, I pressed a key. But
on the screen there still persisted words appearing as before.
Ghastly
grim they blinked and taunted, haunted, as my patience wore,
Saying "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
I tried
to catch the chips off guard, and pressed again, but twice
as hard. I pleaded with the cursed machine: I begged and cried
and then I swore. Now in mighty desperation, trying random
combinations, Still there came the incantation, just as senseless
as before.
Cursor
blinking, angrily winking, blinking nonsense as before. Reading,
"Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
There
I sat, distraught, exhausted, by my own machine accosted.
Getting up I turned away and paced across the office floor.
And then I saw a dreadful sight: a lightning bolt cut through
the night. A gasp of horror overtook me, shook me to my very
core.
The lightning
zapped my previous data, lost and gone forevermore. Not even,
"Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
To this
day I do not know the place to which lost data go. What demonic
nether world us wrought where lost data will be stored, Beyond
the reach of mortal souls, beyond the ether, into black holes?
But sure
as there's C, Pascal, Lotus, Ashton-Tate and more, You will
be one day be left to wander, lost on some Plutonian shore,
Pleading, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
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